I can understand what the fuss is all about. After all, I used to be Mormon—and Mormons don’t appreciate it when you mess with their temples. Curious about what goes on inside? Good luck. But temples aren’t secret, they’re sacred. Well, no, they are secret, else why all the fuss?
That being said, I. CAN’T. BELIEVE. WHAT. THE. DRAMA. IS. ALL. ABOUT.
With catch-phrases like “We’ll Bring the World His Truth,” and “Truth Restored,” I’m perplexed at the outcry being raised in the Mormon community so keen on verity. This HBO piece seems like a golden opportunity to spread the truth of the gospel. At the very least, it seems a chance to begin the demystification process surrounding the temple ceremony.
Not quite a decade ago I was a victim of the mysterious temple ceremony. Prior to my first temple visit I had heard snippets of truths here and there that fomented a host of questions within. No one would/could answer them. Then, just prior to my induction I came across an article on temple ceremonies in general. An accompanying drawing depicted a blindfolded, NAKED initiate on a donkey surrounded by a group of people. Was this what went on in the temple? I started to become physically ill with fear over the possibilities of what went on in there. The thought of family members (gram and gramps?!?) surrounding me in all my naked glory had me dry heaving. We’re freaks! Really, we’re all freaks!
I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. I literally made myself sick as my endowment time approached.
Fortunately there was no donkey or group nakedness, but the nakedness and rituals I had to partake in embarrassed a good Mormon girl like me. I wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear from humiliation. I wanted to run from the building and never look back. And finally, at one point, I did have enough. Being forced into the prayer circle was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I collapsed onto a chair and was out of it. My entire body went numb, including my face.
The temple workers carted me outside of the room and used smelling salts to revive me. The paramedics came. I can still hear them in the room, asking, “Her first time? Yeah, we’ve seen it before.”
What??
This doesn’t seem safe or healthy to me.
Nor does any kind of secret-keeping, sacred or what not. I think openness and honesty was severely lacking before my temple experience, and I assume that same reluctance to talk about it exists today. I hear from many people who talk about how wonderful the temple is, and how it brings them peace. It did not bring me peace. It brought confusion and shame. I wonder, could this have been avoided if I had been properly made aware of what was going to happen?
How does temple secrecy benefit the LDS church? How does it harm it? Do any of you readers out there have an answer? It is a question I have had even before that fateful evening in 1998. Even as an outsider I hope that the LDS church will revisit the way they prepare church members for their experience.
2 days ago
11 comments:
"We’re freaks! Really, we’re all freaks!"
Yeah, that was pretty much the audio loop that ran through my head the entire time during my first visit.
I don't know what's worse: the utter goofiness of it all, or the utter lack of effort on the part of Mormon adults to give their kids a heads up.
Good for HBO/Big Love.
Hmmmm... interesting post. First of all, I don't really see a problem with Big Love showing whatever they want to show. It will probably be incorrect anyway and it will be an opportunity for people to talk about it and what we really believe.
Second of all, before I went to the temple, my Bishop and Stake President talked with me about what my first time through would entail. No big surprise for me.
Third, you aren't naked. You are covered.
I would have to agree that there seems to be a lot of "secrecy" regarding what goes on, but I really think it's because it IS sacred and for people to talk about something so that it becomes commonplace would take away from the sacredness of those ordinances. People just misinterpret what it really is about.
okay . . . i guess i can see your point about the nakedness thing, so let me rephrase it - you are without underwear under a sheathe. whenever else in your life are you sans undies under a blankie? oh wait, don't answer that!
i definitely agree that people can misinterpret things, hence my own story. but i disagree that talking about sacred things would in any way take away from the sacred ordinances.
also, i'm glad you talked with your B and SP. most people i have talked with did not have that experience, including ryan.
I don't really think HBO is the best avenue for missionary work. If people really want to learn the gospel, they can talk with a missionary or a member. As far as the outcry, I think members have a legitimate concern that the depiction could be a mockery of sacred ordinances. Although I doubt HBO really cares what the LDS church thinks...since when did media care for propriety? If they think it'll increase viewership and publicity, they'll most likely go ahead and air it.
I didn't have any issues with any of the temple ceremonies I participated in. I didn't feel scared, just nervous because it was a new experience. You are not a "victim" when you go to the temple, you choose to do it.
I hope you don't mind I'm here reading! I saw your blog address on your Facebook and I'm so glad I did! We have so much in common! It's been eons since I've seen or spoke to you! A LOT has changed! I read your other former Mormon post and it put a huge smile on my face. Not that I want everyone to leave the church, just that you are being true to yourself. I have a blog too, not near as intellectual and witty, but let me know if you want an invite to read. BTW I totally remember your mom telling the story about the day you went the temple and your version is much funnier and far more insightful! ;)
Last time I checked you were still a member of the Church,unless you've been exed or asked to be removed from the records!
thanks, mom. i know i can always count on you to understand the point of my posts! :)
Sorry not your mom look a little deeper! :)
I just want to say that if this was HBO doing a show about the sacred rituals in the city of Mecca, there would be a HUGE outcry. Sometimes I do feel apart of a religion that gets picked on.
I will say, the part that offends me the most about it, is that Big Love is about POLYGAMOUS mormon OFFSHOOT groups. Those people aren't even ALLOWED in the temple! I get sick of being associated with the polygamists.
However, this isn't anything new or "secret". Anyone can look up the entire temple ceremony on the internet. I would just rather that some production company didn't mock something sacred to me and call it entertainment.
Just sayin'.
P.S. Being naked was ALSO my fear! I had to take some temple prep lessons before going for the first time, I think it is mandatory now?
What is the big deal? I love being naked. Anyways I dont care what they show or what you write about. I do love you and I'm not trying to be rude. But, your latest post is yet another example on how you just can't let go. If your done move on already. Don't worry we'll still give you just as much attention.
I was endowed 5 years ago (then sealed) and I never had to be naked. They said to WEAR your garments under your robe. Having said that... I have not been back since. The endowment part was VERY weird for me and my husband. i would do sealings all day. We did not do them on the same day. The sealing was one of the best days of my life. If they could skip over the other part, that would be more than fine with us. We just adopted another baby and we want to get sealed to her so I guess we will be going back soon.
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